“Surprised.”
In last week’s article I suggested an experiment. The experiment was to choose a conversation and listen in a way that is very uncommon: to tune in with all of you. To forget about time. To stop thinking. To have 100% of you listen. For no other purpose except to hear them. To really hear them.
It was an experiment because it suspended any anticipation of what the results would be. The results would simply be what they were.
Well, I’m glad I asked you to do it. My inbox has been a pleasure to open and to read about the results people all over the world wrote me.
They wrote they were surprised.
Surprised by the dramatic change of heart in the other person.
Surprised by the sudden and beautiful closeness they felt with the other person.
Surprised by the evolution of an extremely positive outcome, way more positive than they ever expected or hoped.
Surprised by the other person’s overwhelming willingness and generosity.
Surprised by the incredible harmony between them.
Surprised by how fast it happened.
Surprised by how effortless it felt. How natural.
It was a joy to read about all of the responses. Each one unique and amazing. Beautiful.
Keep in mind, and this is very important, none of these wonderful outcomes were WHY they did it.
They had no idea what to expect. They weren’t anticipating anything. They listened for one reason only – to hear the other person. To feel they were really, truly communicating fully and well. To create REAL communication.
This illustrates something I want everyone to know. Real communication is magic.
The magic of real communication has a complete recipe…a formula you can use in any conversation. Listening is one step in the formula.
When you put the whole recipe together, you get what we call Causative Communication. This is what we teach.
Once you master Causative Communication, it will never let you down.
Trust the process. Then let the magic of the moment simply sweep you away.
Next week I’ll talk about what to do next.
Be the cause!